On C-Sections...

So lately I've noticed an abundance of blogs about about c-sections and the rise in the number of women having them. Honestly, I don't get what the big deal is. If Victoria Beckham doesn't want to push a baby out of her vag then who are we to judge her? If she opts not to breastfeed, is it really any of our business? Personally I got a lot of crap for not sticking it out 14 hours into my induction (more on optional inductions later) but I couldn't fathom pushing a baby out after being awake for more than 24 hours. There were extenuating circumstances surrounding the birth of my son. First of all when it was decided I needed to be induced he had not dropped, nor was I dilated at all. Many women walk around for days or even weeks 1 or 2 centimeters dilated. I was not one of these women. Nor did I have the pleasure of feeling like I had a bowling ball between my legs. My son was perfectly content to stay where he was even at 38 weeks. My induction came as a result of a rise in my blood pressure and given that technically my son was “term” my doctor decided it wasn’t in my best interest to let me be pregnant any longer. I still think she only humored me when I asked to be induced before a c-section was scheduled. Deep down I think she knew the induction wouldn’t work but I had been deeply sucked into team “vaginal birth” and had been told that recovering from a vaginal birth would be easier than recovering from a c-section and a quick recovery is what I needed given that my husband would only be home for 10 days and then it would just be me and my newborn. First of all, any time anyone tells you that they need to check your cervix just be prepared you will never look at this person the same again. Even if the nurse has been amazing, attentive, the best nurse you’ve ever had the pleasure of being nursed by, as soon as they are reaching their fingers up there checking to see if you’re prepared to push anything out you’ll want to rip their fingers off and shove them so far up their nose they come out of the crown of their skull. I’m not exaggerating. No one prepared for that particular pain. I had also been told that contractions feel like “very bad menstrual” cramps. Um…no they don’t. At least not to me. It felt more like my abdomen had been wrapped too tightly in one of those weight loss belly band things and was periodically being pulled just a little bit more tightly. Tight being the operative word here. The contractions weren’t the worst part. I still think having my cervix checked outweighed any other pain I experience as a result of my induction and my c-section, but I digress. As I said before, I only made it 14 hours into my induction before I was begging for a c-section. I don’t feel like I gave up, I’m not disappointed that I couldn’t give birth to my son vaginally. I feel like I made the best possible choice for my son and myself given the circumstances and my doctor supported my decision. Although, I didn’t necessarily choose to have a c-section out of convenience, I don’t think we should judge those who do. After having one myself, I’m not sure what the big fuss is about. Recovery time was about a week. And during that week I wasn’t in bed unable to move from the excruciating pain of abdominal surgery. I just mean that it took about a week to start feeling normal. I can’t imagine that anyone bounces back from a vaginal delivery in less time, especially if there is an episiotomy involved. The only hard thing about the c-section was not being able to hold my son right away but I have to say I don’t feel cheated out of any sort of “bonding” experience either. I love my son with a ferocity that rivals any mama bear’s. In fact, I’ve had the pleasure of defending my young against a bee which made me feel like quite the mama bear even though I was scared shitless of the stupid bee and he had no idea what was going on given his line of vision is limited to about 10 inches and his most recent goal seems to be mastering control of his hand enough to get it into his mouth at his convenience. But I digress, the bottom line here is that it’s up to the individual woman what they decided is best for their child (in conjunction with doctor’s advice, of course).  Do I have any regrets about my birth experience? You bet your ass I do but they have nothing to do with not having a vaginal birth. Am I going to be so hung up about my c-section that I’m going to search high and low for a doctor willing to sit by for a VBAC when I have another baby? No. Not at all. I know what to expect next time and I’m 100% ok with it and I encourage any other woman who’s had a c-section to really reflect on her decision. I don’t think we should judge other mothers who are doing a perfectly good job mothering. Whether or not a woman has a vaginal birth or a c-section the end result is the same. We may not all have the physical scars to prove it, but at the end of the day we all have a tiny little blessing to take care of for the rest of our lives.